Saturday, February 14, 2009

Hymns for the Hopeless

"Well I will be your roof, your shelter from the storm, your footing against the wind.
And I'll mend for you my dear them holes that have been torn, and I hope our paths will cross again"

Okay, that isn't supposed to be as depressing as it sounds. I'm sat in the kitchen, in my PJs, with a large mug of strong black coffee and some blues/country music on the stereo - If you don't know him already, look up a guy called William Elliott Whitmore. A young man with the voice, lyrics and style of a 60-year old bluesman. Evidently had a hard paper round, but he's pretty amazing. - Anyway, it's Valentine's day. St Valentine, who has absolutely nothing to do with love and romance at all. Maybe I should say it's Lupercalia, the ancient Roman festival of fertility, rather than celebrating the feast of a very confusing and possibly fictional saint who, thanks to Chaucer, now is the patron saint of Hallmark tat (as well as beekeepers and epileptics. Go figure). Happy Feb 14th anyway. I'm not feeling especially romantic, but then again I rarely do.

Anyway, so I've got to thinking, as I do every once in a while, about life, love, music, blues, ups and downs, and just thing in general. I love mornings like this, they're where I feel like I can write just what the hell I like. I've been having a conversation online with a mate who's recently split up with his girlfriend, and she's moving out (they've been sharing a house for the best part of a year). But everything is upbeat anyway, he's happy enough in that "ach, it'll work itself out" kind of way. And I guess I'm the same.

I've been having some ups and downs myself, in a few different aspects of my life, but I'm still pretty cheerful. I'm not going to elaborate on what those problems are - this is a public site, even if no-one reads it! - but it's a case of things not being what I had expected or hoped. But I'm not good at getting mad about things so I'm trying to figure out whether it's a case of me being gypped, or did I just not read the small print?

One of the things that's not quite as I expected is my job. Don't get me wrong here, I enjoy it, I love working where I am, the people involved are fantastic, and it's most definitely a step-change from where I was a year ago. It isn't what I expected it to be, but there's two factors in that: 1) I got a job I didn't actually apply for, but which suits my skill set and development better than the one I DID apply for. I'd prefer to be more hands-on, but I don't have the quallies or experience to do that. But, after an appraisal yesterday, the future looks pretty rosey, so I'm content.

As for everything else, it's not quite so simple. But it will work out. That's not anything precognitive, or psychic, I just know myself and I know how I am and how I deal with things, and I know that I have a good group of friends around who'll help me out if I need it. And that's worth more to me than anything else.

-- The rest of the info in this file is marked 'Need to Know'. Sorry, if you're the curious type, but ner ner ne-ner ner --

I've just spoken to some old friends. This makes me happy. I have, however, got the 'too much caffeine and not enough food' shakes, so I must go and eat things.

Happy Whatever-it-is day